


Reading Secrets

by gelduris



Category: BT21, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: BT21 Universe (BTS), Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, but there's hugs, chimmy cries, hopefully cute, they/them pronouns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 02:41:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29181957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gelduris/pseuds/gelduris
Summary: "Oh."Tata stumbled to find the right words to say. The two of them had become so inseparable lately, how had this not come up before? Chimmy must have kept this a secret. Maybe they wanted to keep it a secret. They seemed so ashamed standing here…
Relationships: Chimmy & Tata (BT21)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 1

Tata was clumsier when they grew eight foot.

A screw had slipped from their grasp and fell too quick to snatch up. It thumped onto Chimmy’s head, followed by a flurry of apologies, received with laughter from Chimmy.

The two were installing a new LED sign reading “BT21” on one of outside brick walls of Base Camp. Tata used their stretched legs to reach the perfect placement while Chimmy handed them tools from below. Chimmy placed the fallen screw next to the others to hold down a plastic bag from blowing off the apartment roof.

Tata pictured how the sign would enhance the atmosphere on nights the members could stargaze together. It would go well with the pillow arrangement they would lie on. Or maybe for outdoor movie nights. There was enough wall left for Van to project films onto. Or for dance and band practice, if they ever continued those into the night. Or maybe—

A new question popped into Tata's head. This sign had a plug and Tata knew they went into sockets, but in which step of installation should it be plugged in? Earth’s technology was a bit different from what they grew up with, so they weren’t quite sure.

“Hey, Chimmy? That paper on the ground. The umm… what’s the word… the paper book. Do you see it?”

Chimmy spread out the tools and packaging, careful to keep it all in order. They grabbed the instruction manual.

“Yep!”

“Please read it for me. I need to know if I plug this first or after.”

Tata placed their wrench in their mouth to brace the sign against the wall with the strength of both arms. They waited for instructions. The heat from the sun prickled against their back. It began to hurt. And their arms were growing weak.

“Chimmy? What does it say?” they asked, wrench in mouth.

Tata glanced over their arm. Chimmy had their back facing Tata; their posture was stiff. Only their ears moved from the wind tossing them around.

“Chimmy?”

Chimmy shuffled over to Tata’s legs and held up the instructions, their face kept downwards.

“I can’t look at it myself. I need to hold this up.”

Chimmy kept their position, then tapped the booklet against Tata’s leg.

A sweat ran down Tata’s forehead. Taking the wrench into their arm, they tightened the necessary bolts into place, leaving the plug to swing against the rough brick. It would keep the sign up for now. Tata shrunk their legs back down to meet Chimmy’s height. They gently grasped their friend’s shoulders.

“Chimmy? What’s wrong?”

Chimmy’s gaze kept to the ground. Their body trembled under Tata’s touch. Tata drew their arms back, feeling as if their embrace was any tighter, it would bring Chimmy to shatter. A breathy mumble fell from Chimmy’s lips.

“I don’t know what it says.”

Tata took the instructions and skimmed through. “Plug into outlet after installation.” It was right there. They didn’t understand what prevented Chimmy to say it.

“Is it too small?” Tata asked. “If it’s difficult to read maybe you need glasses like Koya?”

Chimmy’s knees knocked together. Tears slipped to the concrete ground from under their yellow hood. An ache ran through Tata’s whole body.

“I can see it, but I don’t know what it says,” Chimmy choked on their tears. “I can’t read…”

_Oh._

Tata stumbled to find the right words to say. They both had grown so inseparable lately, how had this not come up before? Chimmy must have kept this a secret. Maybe they wanted to keep it a secret. They seemed so ashamed standing there.

Tata placed an arm on Chimmy’s shoulder.

“Hey, Chimmy. You do not have to be embarrassed.”

Chimmy lifted their head. Their mouth quivered and their glossy black eyes trembled like the lid of a stove-pot, water bubbling on too high of a boil, desperate to hold down the overflow.

“I just didn’t know. You never told me,” Tata said.

“I hadn’ told anyone yet. I didn’t want to show anyone I don’t know nothin’.”

“We are friends. You can tell me anything.”

“You all are so much smarter than I am. Koya reads all those big books, Mang can dance, Shooky can bake,” Chimmy sniffled. “Even you can read our language. And you didn’t even live here before. But I’ve lived on earth my whole life and still can’t read anythin’.”

“You’re smart too, Chimmy. You taught yourself how to play the harmonica. And you’re really good at it. We can’t play like you. If you want to learn to read maybe we can ask Koya to help you? I think they would be a good teacher.”

Chimmy gripped their arm tight to their body. “What if they say no? What if they leave me to figure it out for myself?”

“Why do you think Koya would do that?”

Chimmy shook again.

“Cause people always leave me to do that.”

Chimmy’s vision of the torn plastic bag at their feet began to swim. An arm lifted their chin to meet Tata’s kind eyes before embracing them in a hug.

“I can teach you.”

The tears broke from Chimmy’s eyes. They reciprocated the embrace.

“Thank you.”

* * *

That evening, Tata and Chimmy snuck off from Base Camp after music practice to Tata’s spaceship. There wasn’t room for the ship to be kept on the apartment roof, so Tata had left it in the center of a nearby woods. It was a few acres held by the city for future expansion, but nobody except Tata would travel through the twisting trees, which made it a good hiding spot. The ship hadn’t been flown since Tata settled on earth a few years ago and it showed. Greenery crept up its sides. The blue and red paint chipped away in a similar pattern to the rough bark of the surrounding pines. With time it grew more and more a part of the forest itself.

Tata tugged off the ivy gripping the airlock door.

“I have old books I brought from Planet BT. They’re children’s books. I read them growing up to learn your language,” Tata said. They flipped open a panel beside the door. A purple light scanned their arm, highlighting the yellow spots in particular. The door’s lock clicked open.

“I kept them in the spaceship so my father wouldn’t find them. Because they were from Planet Earth…”

Tata yanked on the door. After a few tries it opened with a pop from the seal, inviting in fresh air for the first time in months. Lights flickered back on.

The interior looked the same as when Chimmy first saw it. A single circular room, walls lined with control panels and blinking buttons to keep track of the ship’s location, maintenance, and whatever else Chimmy couldn’t understand. But it wasn’t a cold mechanical room. It was Tata’s after all. Glittery heart and star stickers stuck to the side of keypads. A garland of holographic CDs hung above the dashboard. Doodles of planets and music notes wrapped the walls, along with notes and posters in another language. Chimmy could recognize some were from Earth though, even if they couldn’t read them. But Chimmy’s favorite was the ceiling mural. A whimsical solar system, with what looked to be fish and an eel creature with teeth. The colorful planets ringed around the warm light fixture in the center.

“We can start with the simplest ones first,” Tata said. They presented Chimmy a fabric book with “ABC” in large colorful letters on the cover.

Chimmy took a deep breath. A baby book. They knew they had to start from the beginning, but this only reminded them how far behind they really felt. It must have to take them so long to be able to read at Koya’s level. At Tata’s level. At everyone else’s level… Why should they even bother… No! They were going to read. They had to start somewhere, so they must start with this book.

The two spent the evening on the floor of the spaceship, taking their time to read. Tata comforted Chimmy when they grew frustrated and encouraged their progress. Chimmy would focus on Tata’s words, letting them till up the insecurities that sprouted in their head. For Tata, Chimmy’s steady improvement eased their doubts of being a good teacher. Maybe they _could_ be a good teacher like Koya. They reached for another book.

* * *

Rain droplets pinged against the ship’s metal sides. The sky viewed through the door’s circular window grew darker. The ship lights were dimmed, revealing luminescent doodles in greens, pinks, and purples Tata had scribbled over the walls.

Chimmy leaned into Tata’s side and the board-book they held slipped from their paw. They had long since fallen asleep. Tata stretched out a weak arm to pull over a blanket and placed it over Chimmy. The star print of it rose and fell with each slow breath.

It never took long for Chimmy to fall asleep. Chimmy was fast asleep beside them the night they first met too. Tata had bundled them in this very blanket to keep them warm from the cold outside. That was first time Chimmy had someone to keep them warm. Tata made a promise to themselves that night they would always be there for Chimmy. They would never have to spend another winter night alone again.

Tata coiled their arm into a fist.

Why would someone abandon Chimmy? Who could leave a puppy alone in the streets? No one there to teach Chimmy how to read. No one there to give them shelter. No one there to show Chimmy love—

Chimmy shifted in their sleep and hugged Tata’s arm. A faint smile grew across their white face, cheeks like soft dough powdered with pink. Tata dropped the tension in their arm and shoulders.

It doesn’t matter who abandoned Chimmy at this point. That was in the past. Now Tata would be there for them. And the rest of their friends.

Chimmy would never have to feel alone again.

Tata leaned their head against Chimmy’s. Their eyelids grew heavy. What Tata remembered last was what sounded like the scanner’s buzz from the other side of the door, but they weren’t sure if it was real or from the dreams fogging their consciousness.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chimmy grows a bit too ambitious after their first night learning to read, resulting a big slip up at Base Camp. Tata is determined to remind Chimmy of the worth and skill they see in them.

Sunlight nudged against Tata’s eyelids, encouraging them to open. Tata squinted and rolled over, hiding their face into the soft fibers of the rug. No, pillow. Wait. Pillow?

Tata sprung up, undoing the smooth tuck of their bed-sheet. Their Earth-themed clock ticked on the nightstand, reading 9:15. The window light spanned across the display of Polaroids Tata had taken with their friends taped to the opposite wall.

This was their bedroom. How did they get here? Last night they were in the spaceship with Chimmy. Tata wiped the drowsiness from their eyes, trying to recall if the memory of walking through the woods with Chimmy in their arms was real or a dream. They were in bed now so something must have happened. They could have sworn they remembered the sound of heavy steps. And the rain trickling down their face. Chimmy gently snoring beside them.

Where was Chimmy?

Tata hopped out of bed then untangled their legs from the sheet they dragged with them. They peaked the bedroom door open. The warm smell of pancakes drifted by. Tata let the scent lead them to the kitchen where RJ, Mang, and Chimmy were cooking breakfast.

“Morning, Tata,” RJ said. They poured a dollop of batter into a pan over the stove. It sizzled as it made contact. "Chimmy, how many minutes should this be cooked on each side?”

Chimmy left their whisk to slide into their bowl as they scanned the recipe sheet on the counter.

“Three,” they said after a pause. Chimmy gave Tata a bright smile.

Tata returned a smile back. Was Chimmy reading? So soon after one night? Tata sprung their legs and squeezed Chimmy’s arm, congratulating them. Chimmy leaned into Tata’s ear and pointed to the recipe.

“This has pictures, and I still don’t know what most of this says, but I can recognize the numbers. And a few words like “cup” and “egg”,” Chimmy whispered.

Chimmy continued to whisk with a new burst of energy. Flour puffed up from Chimmy’s bowl as Mang walked over to put away a washed plate. The flour cloud enveloped Mang, causing them to sneeze onto the plate. They sighed, dumping the plate right back into the sink to wash again.

* * *

RJ slid a plate of golden pancakes on the table. Cooky sniffed the rising steam.

“I had extra help from Chimmy today so these cooked quicker than last time,” RJ said, giving a coin-sized pancake to Shooky. They untied their amber apron and draped it over the chair back before sitting.

“These smell sweeter than ever,” Cooky said.

Tata stretched out their leg and gave Chimmy a supportive pat on the knee from under the table. Chimmy smiled with their tongue peeking through before taking a bite of pancake. Tata followed suit.

Tata jerked their head back. A pungent bitter taste drilled into their tongue. They couldn’t even tell what it was, but it started to sting. Tata held back the urge to wash the taste away with their cup of orange juice. But it didn’t matter because they were the only ones who didn’t. The others at the table gagged and choked, downing their glasses.

“What did you add??” Cooky blurted.

“I don’t know what that is,” RJ said.

Shooky took another nibble. They paused to recall their own failed cooking at their grandfather’s bakery. “Tastes like vanilla extract, but too much.”

“The recipe said one teaspoon from what I remember,” RJ said.

Chimmy shrunk in their seat, hugging their sides.

“It doesn’t matter. I guess I can make us eggs instead,” RJ said, standing up with their plate.

The other members nodded. Chairs scooted, feet pattered on the tile, plates hit plates as everyone all set them on the counter. Tata parted through the frenzy of bodies and sounds. They wanted to take a moment to give comforting words to Chimmy, but Chimmy disappeared from sight in the crowded kitchen. Tata’s eye caught sight of a paw shutting the apartment door.

* * *

Tall strands of grass whipped against Tata’s legs. The soggy ground squished under each step. Tata sprinted through the washed-out green of field, following a trail of freshly parted grass.

“Chimmy?” Tata called out.

Only the wind replied. The grass grew sparser as more trees came into view and soon the trail from Chimmy disappeared. But Tata knew where Chimmy was headed. They weaved between the trees. Water splashed their leg as they stepped in a dish-sized puddle of last night’s rainwater. There were a series of puddles, but Tata didn’t take notice. Their vision fixed on the bright yellow hoodie, kneeled by the spaceship’s front door. Chimmy’s paw slid off the door handle after one last attempt to open it.

“I hafta look at those books again,” Chimmy said, holding back their tears.

Tata leaned against the ship to catch their breath.

“No one can read after their first day trying, Chimmy. It’s ok.”

“I’m sorry for ruining breakfast. I’m sorry I ran away.”

Chimmy shrunk down. Tata’s arms wrapped around Chimmy’s sides from behind.

“I’m proud of you. You have made good progress. It’s ok that you messed up, you just need more practice. Just don’t rush yourself,” Tata giggled. “Besides. Today was not the first time we had a bad breakfast. RJ won’t let me make… what is it… cinnamon rolls again.”

Chimmy laughed, brushing away a tear. “Why did you think to bake them in a plastic food container?”

Tata used the scanner to unlock the door.

“The pans were in the sink. I couldn’t use those,” they said with a chuckle.

A puff of air gushed Tata’s face, released from the opening door. Tata bounded over the books left on the floor from last night. Chimmy already read those. There had to be more hiding elsewhere in the ship. Maybe they were in a storage cabinet? Tata tugged opened one of the cabinets in the wall, fridge magnets stuck to its metallic door. They shoveled through the contents, undoing whatever previous organization they had, if there was any. It was mostly markers, paper scraps, spare tools, and whatever Earth memorabilia Tata could hide. They used to be so wrong about their guesses for what these items where before coming to Earth. With a tug they pulled up a tangle of black tape running from a thin plastic case. They still weren’t sure what that one was for though.

Tata closed the cabinet and went around the ship, opening drawers, lifting up panels, peeking behind screens. Chimmy phased their paw through a hologram beside a keyboard. The blue image of a spotted alien fish followed the movement. Tata lifted and searched under the keyboard beside them.

“I um… I can’t find more books. But do not worry. I have another idea.”

They didn’t. But they would have to come up with one for Chimmy’s sake. There was the donations made from their last street performance. Maybe they could buy some lesson books? Tata sighed. Purchasing a telescope could be postponed. They had to do what they could to teach Chimmy.

Metal banged outside the door. Tata and Chimmy’s heads whipped around with a jump. The pounding of Chimmy’s heartbeat quickened as the scanner outside buzzed. The door clicked shortly after, allowing entry to whatever lurked outside. Wasn’t Tata the only one allowed access into the ship? And who else knew its location? Before Chimmy could think more, the door opened and they faced two giant glowing eyes.

“Oh. Hi, Van. Did you come to find us?” Tata said.

Van’s circular eye blinked twice in response.

“Wait! Van may have old files from when I was learning your language when I was young. Van, can you find and show them to Chimmy?”

The floor shook as Van stepped into the ship. Their eyes scrolled colors, searching through megabytes of files stored over the years. Their eyes flashed to a solid cyan blue before projecting a video on the wall from their circular eye.

The video started in a child’s messy bedroom. Paper scraps were scattered across the floor and bed, painted doodles on the walls. A child’s voice could be heard in the background.

“No! Van! The desk!” the little Tata continued in an unfamiliar language. They had an even stronger accent than the Tata now.

The camera jerked downward to a table and zoomed in on the top page of a binding of paper, scribbled with a child’s handwritten text reading “Tata to Earth”.

Chimmy laughed as the Tata beside them spun to Van.

“No! Van! I meant do you have files I used to learn to read?” Tata said, stretching their arms to try to cover the video on the wall.

“I’d like to watch first, if that’s ok,” Chimmy said.

Tata turned back to Chimmy and hesitated.

“Ok. We can watch,” they said, sitting beside Chimmy and pulling up their knees to hide their face behind.

Van continued where the projection left off. Little Tata directed their cameraman with fragments of words Chimmy could and couldn’t recognize; their little blue arms gesturing about, a trait Tata still had. A minute in and little Tata had not begun the actual point of the video. Little Tata cleared their throat and spoke what Chimmy could understand.

“Hello. This is Tata. I will read my book today. It is in Earth lan-gu-age. I made this book myself. It is named ‘Tata to Earth’,” little Tata said with prominent pauses between words.

Little Tata turned the page. The next spread had colorful artwork joined by large drifting text.

“Once upon a time there was a—” little Tata interrupted themselves to speak their first language again. “(all the Earth books seem to start with that, I don’t know why don’t ask me but aNYWAY),” they continued to read. “There was Tata (that me, see?). They live at BT Planet. One day they got lost in space and fell to Earth Planet (Van is my spaceship and see? we’re falling aaaaaa!) On Earth Planet, Tata saw there were superstars everyone loved.”

Tata pulled their knees over their head and groaned. They peaked over them for a moment to see the drawing little Tata made of a performance from the superstars before wrapping their head with their arms. Chimmy laughed into their sleeve.

“The superstars had what Earth Planet call music. Tata’s planet did not have music. Tata always wanted to hear music. Now they found it! They were happy. (look! this is what music looks like, it’s all squiggly and floats in the air and comes from these things).”

Little Tata spent the next few pages explaining their passionate, yet misinformed music knowledge with scribbles of musical instruments to match. Their grown counterpart, leaned back on the rug next to Chimmy and sighed.

“My father didn’t like music. Music came from Earth so I was not allowed to hear it. All this is what I knew from books and what I could sneak home,” Tata said in a low voice, stroking the rug and creating patterns. “I never told you this. But the night I found you. When you were playing the harmonica on the rooftop. That was the first time I heard music.”

Chimmy pulled away from the projection and met Tata with sparking eyes.

“Really?” they asked in a hushed tone, scooting closer.

Tata rolled over and propped up their head with their arms.

“Mm-hm. And maybe people on Earth would think that’s odd, growing up never hearing or making music. But it’s because no showed me. I had to learn how. And now I’m making music with you.”

Tata pulled Chimmy’s hood over their eyes, which prompted Chimmy to giggle. In retaliation, Chimmy covered Tata’s head with the blanket they left sprawled out on the ground from the previous night.

“Chimmy?” a voice whispered behind them.

RJ peeked in from behind Van. The other members gathered around.

“We noticed you two ran off. Is it because of what we said at breakfast? We didn’t mean to embarrass you,” RJ said.

“It’s ok. I feel better now,” Chimmy said, nudging one of the books behind them with their foot.

Shooky, sitting on Cooky’s ear, pointed at the paused image on the wall. Little Tata was directing Van to film their secret drawer of magazine cuttings of the superstars from their book. “Is that Tata?”

Tata slid in front of the projection and stretched their arms like bendy-straws to cover it.

“It’s a dumb video I made long ago. Van was going to end it.”

“Oh! I used to make home videos too,” RJ said then laughed into their fluffy arm. “There was one where RK played a knight and I dressed as the dragon. We used twigs and feathers as horns and scales, sticking them into my fur. But we couldn’t untangle them after and the next day I had to sell yarn with my mother at our shop with twigs stuck all over me.”

This brought the room into a spurt of laughter. Shooky hopped up and down.

“We made videos too! Me and my 362 siblings!” They hopped into Cooky’s paws.

“Me and my friends used to film our boxing practices,” Cooky said. “And we would upload them online. Y’know, to keep track of our improvement. But there was one match between Ian and I—we were really at it. Both of us pulling good blows left and right. And I grew a bit ambitious. So at one point I made the choice to avoid one of Ian’s punches with a backflip. My idea was to give my final blow from above. But what happened was I jumped, but backflipped completely out of the ring, landing in my friend Jooky—our ref’s—arms. And we both toppled to the ground.

“After my friends uploaded the match, it became our most viewed video. I didn’t really realize how many people had seen it until I met Mang. Because Mang was shy to ask if I was from the ‘backflip bunny boxing fail’ video.”

Mang swished back and forth between hiding their eyes and muffling their laugh. Cooky ruffled their mane.

“I would show you guys the video, but I don’t have it right now,” Cooky said.

The still light projected onto Cooky’s side switched colors and began to move. Cooky turned to see their boxing video projected onto the wall. With a laugh they sat on the rug with the others. They all grew entranced in the fight and gripped their sides laughing once Cooky launched themselves over the railing, and tumbled into their friend.

Chimmy’s cheeks grew warm, watching their friends laugh. These were the moments they treasured most. The ones they didn’t experience growing up. It was so intimate to be able to share laughter together, to share these personal stories and videos. Tata was asking Van to show their friends the home video Chimmy had seen. As the video played, Tata occasionally hid their face into RJ’s fur. The others patted Tata on the back and laughed with them.

Tata must really trust them all to show them these videos.

Chimmy took a deep breath.

“Koya?” Chimmy asked, fidgeting with their hoodie strings. “Do… you have any books I can borrow to help me read?”

“Oh? You never mentioned wanting to read before,” Koya said.

“I was really nervous to before…” Chimmy pulled their hood tighter around their face so only their button-like nose showed. “I didn’t want everyone to know I couldn’t read.”

RJ’s soft fur pressed against Chimmy’s nose and arms wrapped around their sides. Chimmy drew their hood back and gazed up to RJ’s comforting eyes, their head illuminated by the celling light behind them.

“There’s no shame learning how to read. You can ask for help anytime.”

Chimmy wiped their eyes with their sleeve then dove their head into RJ’s fur.

Several arms surrounded Chimmy with embraces as they all kneeled to the floor. Chimmy loosened the tension in their shoulders and fists, surrendering to the warmth around them.

“Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> i haven't written a fanfic in a few years so it was nice to begin again :D


End file.
